Thursday, June 17, 2010

In A Place Between Insane & Insecure.

The song "High School Never Ends" by Bowling For Soup is pretty accurate. Granted, it might be a shitty song, but I heard it the other day again for the first time in awhile, and it got me thinking...'yeah, you're right Bowling For Soup' (wow, there's a phrase I bet you don't hear everyday).

Clothes, personality, your friends, among many other things decides who you are as a person, not just to yourself, but also to the people around you. Which might end up leading a lot of people to being insecure. A characteristic of a lot of comics is being insecure. Whether it be in their daily life or onstage. Almost every comedian that I have come into contact with is insecure in some way, shape or form.

Look at me for example. I am a shy person when meeting people for the first time. Take that shyness and put the feeling of being judged in front of other comics I'm meeting for the first time (or co-workers, as I like to refer to them as) and you have one insecure mother fucker. This guy right here. People can be two-faced, I know this. I learned it in high school. So there's always that feeling of other comic's thinking "this guy sucks" whenever performing. It goes with the territory. Every comic brings something different to the table. But along with high school, there's always that feeling of, "man, I wish I was like..." There are a lot of comedians out here who are smarter than me. I'm not smart. Hell, I even say it in my act that I'm not book smart. But I wish that I was. And seeing other comedians creating and talking about 'smart' jokes, tends to be a little scary cause I know I could never come up with that.

Just like high school, there are cliques in the comedy world. It's scary. I didn't like cliques back in high school and I sure as shit don't like them now. In high school, I didn't fit into a set mold. I wasn't smart, I wasn't a jock (big surprise there), I wasn't a prep, I wasn't a country boy, I wasn't a city kid. I tried to make sure that I didn't shut anyone out of my life in high school. If you were friendly, a nice person, and easy to talk to, then awesome! If not, then that's okay too, even though it bugged me if there was that feeling of someone not liking me.

Same goes for me in the comedy world. Not everyone is going to think you're funny. Not everyone is going to like you. Okay, that's fine. But being from a small town, you say 'hi' to people, be friendly, and try and talk to them...that don't really work out here. There are some comedians out here who take a look at you both on stage and off stage, and decide right then and there that you're of no use to them. So why try and be friendly?? Well, cause being a nice person gets you far in life. At least I think so.

A lot of comedians will grow and evolve, both with their persona and material. But the fact of the matter is, a lot of comedians need to grow up. Don't look at other comics as competition. It's retarded. A few 'heys' and 'how are yous' tend to go a long way. I dunno. Maybe that's just my small town history talking. But a part of me feels like that lack of 'small town hospitality' goes in the same boat with people feeling insecure about themselves.